Being a People Pleaser does NOT mean something is wrong with you!

I’ve been a people pleaser since I came out of the womb! 

My mom tells this story, that she loves, about what a good baby I was! I hardly ever cried and I would lay in my crib and “pick” the flowers off my sheet for long periods of time. 

I don’t like that story at all. 

It tells me that from the beginning I was learning how to make my mother happy and make her needs more important than mine. 

So you see, I’m a pro-people pleaser! 

And while I talk about ending the cycle of people pleasing I don’t ever want you to think that means people pleasing is something wrong with you that needs fixing! 

Not at all. 

Being tuned into what other people need is a beautiful and admirable quality, as are the other lovely qualities that tend to come with people pleasing. Empathy, problem solving and the ability to anticipate the needs of others being some of the most common. 

The issue is when we do those things at our own expense. We do all those things for others, and not for ourselves. 

When we take those exact same qualities, empathy, understanding what WE need, solving OUR own problems, anticipating OUR needs…. Queen! That’s where self-love and self-care are! You only need to turn those beautiful qualities onto YOURSELF first, then give them to others. 

That’s where the magic of alignment clicks in.  We get our relationships, careers, how we take care of our bodies, spend our free time, donate to causes, EVERYTHING comes into alignment. 

Is it easy? Hell no! We’ve been conditioned to believe our value is in what we give to others. 

We’ve been conditioned to believe it’s our “job” or purpose to give to others first.

We’ve been conditioned to believe we are selfish if we give to ourselves first. 

I call bullshit on all of that! 

That’s patriarchy. 

I’m soooooo DONE with patriarchy! 

Queen! It’s time to put yourself first! The interesting thing is, when you do, you continue to give to others. And you do it from your overflow instead of exhaustion and obligation! 

If there’s any part of you that is curious about HOW TO turn these qualities of people pleasing onto yourself or you’re reading this saying, HELL YES BRENDA! I’m ready to give to myself first and give to others out of my overflow! Sign me up! 

I am here for you! That is my jam! That’s where my gifts are. Book a 15-Minute Connection Call and we’ll see what the next step is for you. Book your free call HERE.