What do you tell yourself you can’t do?
You can’t:
Lose weight
Get into shape
Surf (that was mine, more about that later)
Handle money responsibly
Get a better job
Start a business
Ask for a raise
Tell your spouse to stop doing what you don’t like
Ask for what you want in bed
Set a boundary with a friend
Stop taking care of others, even when you’re drained because they need you
Afford to take a vacation
I don’t care what it is. We tell ourselves all the time, that we can’t.
I’m sick of it!
I hate to rant… sort of, but this one kills me.
Either we can do it, or we don’t want to.
Because if we really want to, we’ll find a way. Otherwise, let’s be honest and say, “I don’t want to.”
It’s okay not to want to. You can, not-want-to put in the effort to get a better job, ask for a raise or start a business. Or, maybe you don’t really want to lose weight, get into shape or surf. While we live in a culture that values money, prestige, being thin and physically fit, you can buck the system and say, nope. That isn’t me. I don’t want to.
Cool. I can get behind that!
Here’s what I can’t get behind.
You have a thought that tells you, you aren’t good enough to do one of those things you want to do. Or a thought that tells you that you’re too old, too young, too fat, too thin, too out of shape, that your husband won’t listen, or your friend won’t respect your boundary, or you haven’t made enough money to go on vacation!
Those are the thoughts I cannot abide.
Those thoughts are not true.
I’ve told myself for the last couple of years that I can’t learn to surf. I’m too old, too out of shape, it’s too late for me. Then I met Alex. She’s a genius when it comes to the body and what’s possible. I told her I really wanted to surf, but couldn’t, because I was too old and out of shape and she said, “that’s not true! I can help you get into shape to surf. I’ll show you what to do and you do it. In six weeks, you’ll have confidence in your ability to surf.” *Note, that doesn’t mean I’ll be ready to surf, but I’ll know I can get there. Alex is honest as well as motivating!
I’m not saying I can’t surf anymore. I am saying that I can get into shape so that I can.
As far as losing weight goes, that’s clear, I don’t want to.
It’s incredibly liberating to be honest with ourselves.
What do you need to be honest with yourself about?
If you really don’t want to do it, even if it’s not popular, just be honest and say, you don’t want to. You’ll feel how freaking liberating that is!
If you want to do something and you don’t know how to get there, like me with surfing, then stop saying you can’t, and find someone who can help you! That’s why we need fitness trainers, coaches and all other types of teachers and mentors. They help us get where we want to be when can’t seem to get ourselves there.
Just do it, as Nike says. Hire the coach, hire the fitness trainer, book the vacation, lose the weight, whatever it is that you want…you CAN do it!
I’d love to chat with you about whether or not I can help you in the coaching department. It’s super easy, schedule a 10-minute call with this link, and we’ll figure it out. Easy, peasy.
xoxo,
Brenda