You are bigger than your fear.

Breathe that in. You are bigger than your fear.

When you’re living with fear, it doesn’t feel that way. I know.

Here’s the deal. If you couldn’t pull off the ‘thing’ that scares you, you wouldn’t even have the thought to do it!

Hear that truth.

We imagine things and want the things we want, we have the ambitions we have, the dreams and yearnings we have, BECAUSE we have the ability to achieve them. Thomas Edison had an idea for a light bulb. No one believed he could do it. He failed 10,000 times! I imagine he felt a little fear during those 10,000 failures. And then… he got it.

Your dreams, ambitions and yearnings are a gift from the Divine. The world needs you to do what you’re afraid to do.

I don’t know about you, but I want it all!

I want to live, love and thrive in my entire life! It’s not enough to be a good mom, or great friend, or have a fun sex life, or a successful business…take out the “or” baby! I want it all! That’s why I love all the women gathering for my new program, Live Lavishly!

Live Lavishly will show you how to slay that fear. You’re bigger than your fear, and… you may need some help slaying it. No problem. There’s no shame in that! We aren’t designed to “go it alone” in life. That’s why I love being a life coach! Coaching people through what scares them and gets in the way of the life they desire, well, that’s what I yearn for!  

Won’t you join me and a powerful group of women who are choosing to get past their fears and Live Lavishly! Get all the deets and register here. Now. Yes. Choose you.

I hate it when I do this!

Have you ever kept quiet when you knew the answer?

Have you ever passed on an opportunity because you thought someone else was more deserving?

Have you ever been less than you are, in an attempt to make someone else feel more comfortable?

How often do we “lose” when we could “win?” Play small in order to fit in, not make waves or not make someone “feel bad.”

It’s time to stop.

That might sound more boss-y than coach-y, but it’s appropriate in this case. Sometimes, we just need to stop doing what we’re doing.

It never serves the world, or our greater good, to be less than we are. Think of yourself as the parent of a talented child. Maybe she’s a brainiac who pretends she doesn’t know the answer so the other kids don’t tease her. Maybe she’s a field hockey player who purposely misses a goal so her teammate doesn’t feel bad for not scoring as many.

If you were her mother, you would tell her to stop that! That her playing small, not being her absolute best, doesn’t serve anyone. That the kid who is teasing her is jealous and the teammate who feels bad, has her own insecurities. And, that’s not her problem. Let them work on their jealously and insecurity with their parents, a teacher or coach. It’s not her job to fix their problems. It’s her job to be the best she can possible be! Isn’t that what you’d tell her?

That’s what I’m here to tell you. Stop shrinking. Stop playing small. Stop being less than you can be.

Here’s where coach Brenda comes in (we’ll set boss-y Brenda aside.) I know that to stop doing something we’ve done for a long time, is easier said than done.

I’ve got two solutions.

1.     Start to become aware of every time you shrink or play small. We can’t change something until we are aware of it, the moment we do it. That creates the opportunity to change and make a different decision. If you’re aware, but still struggle with choosing you to stand in your truth, make a list of the thoughts you have that stop you. They probably sound something like this, “you’re being arrogant.” “Who do you think you are?” “You don’t want to make them feel bad.” Take those thoughts and become your own ideal parent. Tell your beautiful self that your job is to be the best you. If that bothers someone, it’s their job to figure out why they don’t want you to be your best.

2.     My new program, Live Lavishly, is the perfect solution to this challenge. It’s so easy to play small and Live Lavishly has tons of tools to help you break that habit and replace it with empowering decisions and actions. It’s a ‘whole-life’ solution. We dive into everything from our bodies, sex, relationships, money, our careers… we want to Live Lavishly in all aspects of our lives! Join me and a beautiful community of women to stop playing small and getting the tools and skills they need to Live Lavishly! Check out all the details and register here.

Let’s promise each other that we will stop shrinking. No matter how hard it is.

Marianne Williamson said it best, “There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Live Lavishly Light Episode #13

What happens when you're sick of being married? 

I'm not talking about actually wanting to leave.

There are times in every relationship when you're sick of it! You're fed up with your spouse. 

In today's Live Lavishly Light Episode I'll give you a couple of sure-fire ways to deal with this lifestyle challenge and get back on the path of joy. 

Let me know how it worked for you in the comments below. Especially if you ran into any challenges and difficulties. 

xoxo

Brenda

Live Lavishly Light Episode #12

How do you want to feel today? 
 

Can you choose how you feel? 

I think you can. I don't mean I want you to be in denial or cover-up how you feel. 

I want you to feel empowered to shift how you feel.

In today's Live Lavishly Light episode I'll tell you how. 

I'd love to know if you try it and how it works for you. You can even tell me I'm full of crap if you want! That's okay too. Let me know how it feels to shift your feeling state in the comments below. 

xoxo

Brenda

Are you your thoughts?

I was talking to my super smart friend, David Winkelman, of Winkelman Solutions about our thoughts. 

He gave me this great quote, "Your thoughts don't care about you." 

That got us going on a long conversation. 

David is someone who I refer to as a change agent. Change is his specialty. He helps organizations and people create change. 

I asked him to join me for a recorded conversation on this topic that I could share with everyone who signs up to be in Enough Already Insider. Of course, he said, yes. That's the kind of guy he is. 

I had this idea that I wanted to give everyone who signed up as an Enough Already Insider, some cool bonuses, just for signing up. 

The idea took wings and flew! When you sign up to be an Enough Already Insider, you'll get my conversation with David. It's juicy and delicious!  But, that's not all, as they say! 

I talked to some other cool friends and we've created a body, mind, spirit and soul bonus package for you. Here's how it looks: 

Body: Certified Fitness Instructor and Nutrition Advocate, Alyssa Crawford is going to talk about the CORE 4. These are four simple things you can easily implement as we start a new year and you think about improvements you may want to make to your body. Alyssa isn't going to tell you to do 40 push-ups, so no worries. I am terrible at getting regular exercise, but her CORE 4 left me feeling like, "I can do that!" Join Alyssa and I as we chat from her LA home. 

Mind: This the talented David Winkelman and the conversation about our thoughts not caring about us. You won't want to miss this. 

Spirit: My beautiful friend and certified life coach, Monna McDiarmid created an audio of a poem she wrote about self-compassion. I met Monna in Paris on a retreat. This woman is so beautiful, inside and out, it is stunning. She has the most beautiful way of practicing the art of self-compassion, something most of us aren't very good at. I asked her to share some of her secrets with us. 

Soul: That's me. I've got a guided meditation you'll be able to download, plus a worksheet to support you in recording your insights from the meditation. I love guided meditation because it's a lot 'easier' than trying to sit still and will yourself to clear you mind. Your mind will follow the imagery and scenes I describe. That serves to free your soul to get in touch with the soul's mother-ship, the Divine. From there you can 'hear' what the Divine has for you. 

I hope you'll decide to join the Enough Already Insider group! You'll get these delicious bonuses, plus, a special discount when Enough Already registration opens.

I've also decided to offer a "bring a friend" discount! I'll give you, and as many friends as you want, a discount! If you're an Insider, that means two discounts. We're going to have a private Facebook group as part of the Enough Already program and I know you'll enjoy going through the program with a friend. So, grab her (or him, all men are welcome!) and have them sign up as an Enough Already Insider so they get these yummy bonuses, then you'll both get a discount when you register. 

Remember, there's no obligation to register for the program as an Enough Already Insider. Enjoy the bonuses as our New Year's gift to you! 

Did you get all the yummy goodness in the Live Lavishly Manifesto?

Did you get all the yummy goodness in the Live Lavishly Manifesto?

What am I talking about? I've been running a series of videos on the 10 principles of my Live Lavishly Manifesto. I created the manifesto to support all of us (Yep! Me too!)

It's a series of 10 videos and they cover a lot of cool stuff that will help all of us live our best life! I put them in a playlist in Youtube so you can head over and see them there.

Why is the Manifesto important?

I'll use a story of my own to illustrate the importance of the Live Lavishly Manifesto. (If you don't have it, you can pick it up here)

I had a challenging week. It was very stressful and included potential financial setbacks. I wasn't feeling very abundant. I was struggling not to feel like a victim. (YUK! I can't stand feeling like a victim and I know as soon as I do, I've got some self-coaching to do!) I was freaking out about how it might effect me financially. And then...I got my own email (yep, I put myself on my distribution list so I see what you see) with the video I recorded for Live Lavishly Manifesto 8 on living in abundance, even if our circumstances don't reflect abundance. BAM! I had to laugh out loud! The perfect antidote to what I was feeling and thinking.

So that's the true benefit to a Manifesto. On your bad days it reminds you of who you know you are on your good days. No one said it was going to be easy. If it was easy, as they say, everyone would do it.

Live Lavishly

I encourage you to get the Manifesto  and watch the videos. Let them support you on your journey to Live Lavishly.

Is it Possible to Have it All?

Is it possible to have it all?

What does that even mean? Aren't we meant to grow and learn? Isn't it about the journey? How do we get to a place that feels like we have it all?

As we wrap up the Live Lavishly Manifesto series (if you don't have your manifesto, get it here) I want to share what might be the most important manifesto of them all.

There is no power outside of you greater than the power inside of you.

Stop. Read that again. Breathe it in. That means there's no job, no person, no relationship, no circumstance, no amount of money, nothing. Nothing that is more powerful than your glorious, divine self! Check out today's video and let it sink in. You don't have to believe me. Just give yourself permission to try it on for a little bit. Just for a moment. See what happens? It's liberating. Freeing. That's having it all. It's Living Lavishly!

Do you want more Freedom in your Life?

Do you want more freedom in your life?

How do we get more freedom? Is it dependent on how much money we make? How much free time we have? Whether our relationships area running smoothly? Does life have to be free from conflict?

Freedom is my siren call!

It's probably my number one value in life.

If life has to be problem free in order for us to feel free, we're in trouble!

Check out today's Live Lavishly Manifesto as we talk about manifesto number nine. Freedom is my siren call! What does that mean and how to we cultivate a feeling of freedom that can't be taken away from us?

If you don't have your Live Lavishly Manifesto, pick it up here.

Can we live in abundance when our circumstances don't reflect abundance?

Can we live in abundance if our circumstances don't reflect abundance?

Yes! Not only can we, I think we must. That's when it's imperative to cultivate the feeling of abundance. It's not a matter of waiting until our outer lives reflect abundance, then we'll feel it. That's easy. And sometimes it happens that way.

What do you do when you can't pay your bills? How do you feel abundant?

That's exactly what I'll talk about in today's Live Lavishly Manifesto 8 - I live in abundance regardless of circumstance for abundance is a state of mind.

I know because I've been there. Broke, scared and searching for the state of mind that is abundance. I found it, and so can you.

If you don't have your Live Lavishly Manifesto, grab it here.

Is it important to practice self-care?

Are self-care and rest really important?

I can tell you, from experience, when I don't practice self-care and get the rest I need, it's not a pretty picture!

Why is it so important? Why do you need to make it a priority as you're creating the lavish life that you deserve?

We'll talk about it in today's Live Lavishly Manifesto 7 - I believe in self-care and rest.

Live Lavishly Manifesto

If you don't have yours, go here to grab it!

I know you want it all!

I know you want it all! Me too! (I even recorded a video about it below)

We want great relationships, meaningful work, fun, physical health and abundance.

But, the journey to our best life can be harder than it sounds.

Along the way, we get tripped up. Limiting beliefs, thoughts about not being enough, or having enough, or being unworthy sneak in.

They can derail us in insidious ways. I’ll tell you how it happened for me as I was getting ready to go to Paris.

Insidious thoughts

One of my insidious thoughts is that I’m not worthy. Oh how I hate that one! Of course, I would never say that out-loud to myself. I mean, it’s ridiculous! As a life coach I can’t possibly say it out-loud and believe it. Of course not. That’s why it’s insidious. It sneaks in, like water in a basement, and starts rotting things out before I even realize it’s there.

But, there I was, on my flight to Paris and it hit me. I was about to embark on a five-star experience. I was going to be treated like a Queen for five days. Fabulous hotel, spa treatments, flowers in my room, a private boat trip on the Seine, a photoshoot with photographer, hair and make-up. It was a five-star trip on an emotional and professional level as well. I was going with kick-ass Master Coach, Susan Hyatt. Susan inspires me, helps me dig deep into my own shit and kicks my ass if I need it.

With all this yummy goodness, what could the problem possibly be? It started a week or so before I left, then grew while I was packing, driving to the airport, waiting for my flight…(can you see the water seeping into the basement?)

How a long flight changed me

I was dozing off after dinner and a couple glasses of wine on the plane. I felt the unworthiness in the pit of my stomach. As I lay against the window, hoping to sleep, I heard something. Like a voice in my head, but it was so clear I almost wondered if the man next to me had said something. It said, “It’s you. You’re the one.”

Just like that, I knew it. I felt it deep in my core. I am worthy. I am the one.  I am worthy of everything I desire. For the next five days in Paris, I lived from that place of knowing my worth. It was glorious.

Live Lavishly Manifesto

I created the Live Lavishly Manifesto to support all of us as we create our best life. At the heart of living lavishly is the absolute knowing that we are worthy. Because…

You are the one.

If you don’t have your Live Lavishly Manifesto, you can get it here.

Here is the video on Manifesto #1