When was the last time you had fun?

I noticed last week, I haven’t been having enough fun! 

There have been good “reasons” for it. Maybe you’ve got “good reasons” too. Here are mine:.

• I’ve had the shingles for over two months so my body is NOT  feeling 100%. They are almost healed, but my energy is low along with my motivation.

• My mom is 89 and has suddenly started declining… quickly! So, that’s been a mental/emotional challenge as well as helping my sister figure out what we need to do for her care. 

• There’s been drama with my adult kids and their lives. Some of it good, a relative getting engaged… so sweet, my son running an Ultra Trail Run (37 miles! Good grief!)! Some of it not so good! A remodel job gone wrong, a roof leak in the middle of the night, a trip to the ER in the middle of the night, injuries to a wrist and calf… 

Basically, life. 

It’s easy to stop having fun when too much life happens. 

Here’s my promise to you, now that I see it, I’m going to change it. 

That’s what I help clients do, so right now, I’m practicing what I preach. 

I took a boat trip with my son, daughter-in-law and the newly engaged love birds on Friday! It was soooo fun! I love being on a boat out on the water! And to do it with my family is extra special. 

I scheduled a pedicure and I’m making sure I get to the beach several times a week. And, I ordered some water color paints because I really want to start painting!

I’ll be posting more fun stuff on IG because I realized, since I wasn’t having much fun, my IG feed looks very “businessy” as if all I do is coach! 

Time to reacquaint myself, and you, with ALL of who I am, including the fun parts!!! 

What can you do for fun today, or this week? 

Tell me about it! Post it on IG and tag me! Let’s be on a mission to add more fun to our lives!! 

What is Self-Care?

There is no single definition of self-care, but it is often described as performing a series of actions to improve your physical, mental, and emotional wellbeing. The subject of self-care is a very broad one, and it certainly means something tremendously different to each and every individual. self-care is indeed much more than these things, and there really is no right or wrong way to indulge in this practice as long as it is something that helps to bring you joy and makes you feel mentally and physically refreshed, 

But what do you think Self care really is? 

In Today’s Episode of Liberate Your People Pleaser, I’m gonna share Some examples of what Self care is for me, not only that, but I’m also going to dig deeper and answer some very important questions:

- What does self-care really mean?

- Why is self-care important? 

- How to differentiate between self-care & pleasure?

Listen to today’s episode HERE

If you like Today’s Episode, please don’t hesitate to post a 5-Stars review if you’re listening to the Podcast on Apple iTunes or Spotify and leave us a review telling us how our podcast helped you in a specific aspect of your life. It makes me so happy to see listeners' feedback because it motivates me to create content that is impactful for you and other listeners.

Is it time to spice up your relationship with pleasure?

Sex is a beautiful way to express your love and affection to someone you love. It’s also a great way to release stress and dramatically change your mood. 

But, Have you ever felt like you want to be intimate with your partner, but your body doesn’t seem to be coming to the party? I think it’s probably happened to all of us.

Sex can feel like such a confusing and complicated topic, that many of us avoid it. Today, we’re looking at things with our eyes wide open! 

In today’s episode of Liberate Your People Pleaser I’m going to dig deep & discuss this topic with my guest, Liz Dube. Liz  is an expert on sex & intimacy. She speak to groups and blog regularly on the topic of sex and relationships

 What you will discover:

- What does a sex therapist do?

- How to Ignite Your Sexual Desire?

- How to deal with the lack of sexual desire, satisfaction, or confidence?

- How to stop being in the pleaser-mode while having Sex?

And much more… Listen to today’s episode HERE

If you like Today’s Episode, please don’t hesitate to post a 5-Stars review if you’re listening to the Podcast on Apple iTunes or Spotify and leave us a review telling us how our podcast helped you in a specific aspect of your life. It makes me so happy to see listeners' feedback because it motivates me to create content that is impactful for you and other listeners.

How Can Pleasure Can be a Litmus Test?

Do you use pleasure as a litmus test? 

You may think that is a crazy question! 

In the world I grew up in there was a sort-of “nobility” placed on suffering and definite suspicion about anything around pleasure!

No one openly talked about pleasure. 

Even sex wasn’t talked about in the context of pleasure. It’s as if you should keep it to yourself if you were experiencing pleasure with sex. 

Anybody with me?? Comment down below and tell me if anyone you grew up with talked about pleasure!? 

As I’ve grown spiritually, I’ve begun to understand the true role of pleasure as a tool for guidance.

Yes, I’ve just used the words, spiritually, pleasure and guidance in the same sentence! 

I have come to know and experience that we are, I am, you are - designed for pleasure. 

When it’s time to make a decision, a great way to know what to do, is to ask, “does this feel like pleasure or pain?” 

I’ve learned the hard way sometimes, to move towards pleasure. 

Sure, the pain decision is sometimes more socially accepted. We live in a time that thrives on fear, pain, suffering, anxiety and things being “hard.” 

But, pleasure… that takes me into my unique self-expression. 

Pleasure leads me into authentic power. 

Pleasure moves me towards “scared-cited.” A lovely phrase for when you’re stretching outside of your comfort zone and into your next evolution. 

I hope you’ll join me for a Club and a Room I’ve recently started in Clubhouse. I apologize in advance for android users who can’t join. It wasn’t my idea to make it an Apple only platform, but alas… it is. 

The Club is, Sex+Pleasure+Freedom and the Room is, Sex as a Gateway to Awakening, which meets every Wednesday at 12:30 pm Pacific time. 

Follow me in Clubhouse, after setting up your profile and I’ll follow you too. 

Join the Sex+Pleasure+Freedom Club here: https://www.joinclubhouse.com/club/sex-pleasure-freedom

Join me for the Room Sex as a Gateway to Awakening on Weds. at 12:30 pm Pacific  here: https://www.joinclubhouse.com/event/mWOlVAn8

If you aren’t in Clubhouse, let me know with your reply that this topic interests you. I am super passionate about this topic and would gladly coach or create a program for it! 

Can You Be a People Pleaser in the Bedroom?

One of the tell-tale signs of people pleasing, when it’s not one of our super-powers, is that we aren’t really clear on what it is that we want. 

We get so wrapped up in what we think other people want and need, we can lose track of our own wants and needs. 

That can be disastrous in the bedroom. Trust me, I know. 

In today’s episode of Liberate Your People Pleaser I share a very personal story of my journey from being sexually abused as a kid and thinking I was frigid in my marriage to liberating myself to a fun and pleasurable life in the bedroom! 

If I can do it, so can you. 

I’ve got the first step for you in today’s episode. Listen to it HERE. 

Please DM me or email me if you need support in this area. You do not need to figure it out alone. I’m here as your guide on the journey. 

In love and pleasure, 

Brenda

People Pleasing in the Bedroom 🙄

It’s time to talk about how people pleasing affects us in the bedroom. 

This is a subject near and dear to my heart, because I’ve lived through sexual abuse as a child and a truly disfunctional sex life in my first marriage. 

When that marriage was over one of my most prevailing thoughts, even though I had four kids from 8 - 15 years old that I needed to support on my own when I didn’t make enough money to do that… was, yay! I never have to have sex again! 

I know. Hard to believe! 

This is a big topic that I can’t do justice to in one blog, but let’s start the conversation. 

When we are in our people pleasing habits that keep us prioritizing our partners wants, needs, feelings, likes and dislikes, we can’t be in our authentic power. When we aren’t in our authentic power, we can’t be authentic lovers. 

We can have sex. We can say yes, when we want to say no. We can tell ourselves it’s what’s expected of a good wife/husband. (Yes, ladies, there are plenty of men who are people pleasers in and out of the bedroom and it doesn’t serve them any more than it does us.) We can go through the motions, but the best sex is always when we’re really present. 

That’s why, for those of you who have experienced it, it can be easier to have great sex with a stranger. There’s not any relationship baggage and we tend to be present. Our bodies were made for pleasure. If we show up and are present, it unusually turns out to be pretty good! 

How do we get our power back in the bedroom? How do we stop saying yes when we mean no, or prioritizing what our partner wants over what we want? 

The first step is deciding it’s important for you to get what you want and need in the bedroom. You’ve got to believe you have the right for your wants and needs to be a priority. Of course, in a healthy relationship we share who’s needs get priority if our needs are conflicting, but it can’t always be your lover’s turn! 

The second step is to know what you want. 

Wait. 

That might be a problem. 

If you’ve been prioritizing your lover for a long time, you might have lost touch with what you want in bed. What gives you the most pleasure. What is fun to you. If you’ve lost touch with your own pleasures, it’s time to go back to when you were a kid and innocently enjoyed exploring your  body and sexual stimulation. 

I grew up in such a sexually dysfunctional family, I didn’t do any innocent exploration of my body or sexual pleasures until I was in my 30’s. Yep. That’s not a typo! So… If I made it to sexual pleasure and freedom, you can too! 

Start. Take one step. Then take another. 

If you need some help, I’m here for you. 

This is a perfect issue to get some one-on-one coaching for. 

I promise, no matter where you’re at, there’s hope. You can have fantastic sex and feel authentic power in the bedroom. You aren’t alone. You don’t have to figure it all out. I’m here to gently guide you into your authentic sexual expression. Hit reply, your email is confidential and I’m the only one who will see it.

In power and pleasure, 

Brenda

Lions and Tigers and Bears! Oh MY!

Dorothy had lions and tigers and bears! Oh My!  

Many entrepreneurs feel like Dorothy when it comes to: pleasure (no time for that!) Profit (breaking out in a sweat yet?) Power (you feel like your biz is in control! You're rushing to the demands of clients, being responsive to your FB Group and playing catch-up with email.) 

I'm here to help you transform all that rushing, self-doubt and fear into the actual secret to your success! 

What does it look like when Power, Pleasure and Profit are actually the secrets to your success? 

1. ​Power - You set better boundaries in personal and professional relationships, or have the confidence to raise your prices or take a bold move to expand your business. You decide how to engage in social media, what new marketing strategies to try and which ones to walk away from and you stop hating your inbox.

2. Pleasure - You enjoy going to you desk each day, allow yourself a "fun Friday" with no work appointments and spending the day having fun, taking care of yourself and replenish your energy.  You take the time to have great sex-alone or with a partner! It's incredibly energizing and is a catalyst to more creativity and tons of great ideas! 

3. Profit - You stop dreading looking at the numbers in your business. You cultivate an abundance mindset and feel making money is more like a game you can win, than a mystery you'll never understand. 

Sounds good, right? 

But, how do you do it? ​

That's what I'm here for. 

I've made the transformation. From fear to confidence. From letting my clients, my inbox and others have the power in my biz. I've definitely transformed pleasure from something to avoid to something I am intentional about, and I've learned how to make being profitable a fun game instead of a dreaded appointment with the accountant! 

I can show you how to do it in your biz.

J​oin me for kickass masterclass on Tuesday, September 18th! I'm sharing my three secrets to Power, Pleasure and Profit in your Business.

Click here to register. You'll get the link to join, an interactive worksheet and the post-class recording.

I can't wait to share this with you!

Power. Pleasure. Profit. Sound good?

If you’re an entrepreneur, I’m sure you’d like to always stand in your power when it comes to you business.

I know you want more profit!

Has your business and your life lost the thrill of pleasure?

Then I’ve got the solution for you!

Join me on Tuesday, September 18th at 9:00 a.m. Pacific and Noon Eastern for my newest masterclass, Three Secrets to Power, Profit and Pleasure in your Business.

You don’t want to miss this. When you register you’ll get a link to an interactive worksheet and you’ll get the recording afterwards.

Click here to register and get ready for more Power, Pleasure and Profit in your life!