Discover Your True Path: Empower Yourself to Live with Joy

What does living in joy have to do with discovering your truth? 

Joy is a great way to know if you’re in your truth or in a conditioned response that feels like the truth. 

In today’s episode of Uncover and Elevate I’m going to break that down and explain: 

1. How to know if your in your truth or a conditioned response

2. How joy can be your barometer for truth

3. How tuning into your body and bring clarity to the process. 

Listen to today’s episode HERE. 

Let me know if you resonate with what I’ve shared and if you’ve got a spot where you struggle to know, or trust, your truth. You can email me, brenda@brendaflorida.com or DM me!

Please share this episode on social and tag me! Then I’d love for you to post a 5 Start Review wherever you get your podcasts. It makes such a big difference and will help others find the show. I’ll be incredibly grateful!

Are You Being Authentic or is it Conditioning?

It’s hard to know if we are acting in a way that is authentic or if we’ve been so conditioned we think it’s authentic. 

In this podcast episode encore, I’ll dive into that very question. 

Many of our beliefs were ingrained in us as children, from our parents and other influential adults. In most cases, these beliefs serve us well until a certain point. But after that point, some beliefs become limiting and perhaps even damaging.

What if this belief, that you picked up a long time ago, that has been encouraged by society, family, or/and friends, is actually a conditioned way of believing and you have accepted it for so long it feels like your truth?

Today am sharing some examples and real-life experiences in context to our today’s episode of Liberate Your People Pleaser, and I’m gonna also dig deeper and answer some very important questions:

- How to know if the belief you have for yourself is Authentic or a conditioned one?

- How to break through a belief that you've been thinking it's who you are?

- How Living with the Conditioned & False Beliefs is Hurting you?

And much more.. Listen to today’s episode NOW!

Exploring Authentic Sexual & Gender Expression with Samantha Fox

Have you heard people talk about experimenting or exploring their sexual expression? Sexual expression is loaded with cultural and religious rigidity and shame, so many people don’t even think about experimenting or exploring sexually.  You may be wondering, Is it ok to be curious about and explore my sexual expression?

Today’s guest, Samantha Fox and I say, 100%, yes!  It is absolutely normal and it is more common than you might think, to explore your sexuality. I believe it is healthy for one to explore their sexual identity and expression rather than to simply follow society norms. If you don’t, you could end up living your whole life without ever knowing this aspect of yourself.

In today’s episode of Liberate Your People Pleaser I’m going to dig deep and discuss this topic with my guest, Samantha Fox. Samantha is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in New York. She has been in private practice since 2012, working with individuals and couples struggling with sexuality, sexual issues, coming out later in life and intimac. In addition to her therapy practice, she has built a coaching program to give women a safe space to explore, find and live their truth, and to create an embracing community for women around the globe that are questioning their sexuality or coming out later in life.  

What you will discover:

- Why there is discomfort moving into Sexual Curiosity.

- How To explore your sexuality and sexual expression.

And much more… Listen to today’s episode HERE

If you like Today’s Episode, please don’t hesitate to post a 5-Stars review if you’re listening to the Podcast on Apple iTunes or Spotify and leave us a review telling us how our podcast helped you in a specific aspect of your life. It makes me so happy to see listeners' feedback because it motivates me to create content that is impactful for you and other listeners.

I did a total 180 on this…

I was raised to judge and condemn everyone who was not a cis gender herterosexual. 

How did I get to be queer friendly? 

I consider myself an ally to everyone identifying as LGBTQA+, non-binary, pansexual, and an anti-racist. (Although my calling myself an ally doesn’t make me one! It is by our actions that we demonstrate how much of an ally we are!)

All those fundamentalist Christian beliefs began to crumble as I contemplated what I was taught, that “God” is love… (FYI, I don’t use the word God very often because I still associate it with the oppression of that culture, so use your own word if you want, the Divine, Source, The Quantum Field, whatever works for you.)

… it didn’t make any sense to me that love would create anything that wasn’t also love. 

Everyone had to be sourced from love.  

There is no condemnation and nothing is wrong with who we are.  

It is our birthright to be our authentic self. 

Twisting ourselves into being someone we are not, is painful because we’re not supposed to do it. Like putting a hand on a hot stove is painful.  

Love created us. Love didn’t make any mistakes. 

You and I are love. 

I know there are issues, political and cultural, that make things complicated and challenging. I’m not attempting to address them in this blog. 

I am wanting to say loud and clear, YOU ARE LOVE. I AM LOVE. We are created as love. 

You are beautiful just the way you are. 

How to Own Your Brilliance?

Do You Own Your Brilliance?

It might seem like an odd question to ask, and it’s likely that no one has ever asked you that before. So… think about it. Are you using your gifts, intelligence, skills and genius on your terms? That’s what owning your brilliance looks like and if we don’t own it, we get into stressful situations where others are wanting to be in control of our brilliance!

In today’s episode of Liberate Your People Pleaser I’m going to dig deep and answer some  very important questions regarding today’s topic:

- How to own your brilliance and express it in a unique way ?

- How do People-Pleasers minimize their success & accomplishments ?

And much more.. Listen to today’s episode HERE

If you like Today’s Episode, please don’t hesitate to post a 5-Stars review if you’re listening to the Podcast on Apple iTunes or Spotify and leave us a review telling us how our podcast helped you in a specific aspect of your life. It makes me so happy to see listeners' feedback because it motivates me to create content that is impactful for you and other listeners.

Authentic or Conditioned?

Belief systems are the bases of people’s worldviews. We have beliefs grounded in fact, and beliefs grounded in emotion and life experience. These belief systems shape our world view. 

Many of our beliefs were ingrained in us as children, from our parents and other influential adults. In most cases, these beliefs serve us well until a certain point. But after that point, some beliefs become limiting and perhaps even damaging.

What if this belief, that you picked up a long time ago, that has been encouraged by society, family or/and friends, is actually a conditioned way of believing and you have accepted it for so long it feels like your truth?

Today am sharing some examples and real life experiences in context to our today’s episode of Liberate Your People Pleaser, and I’m gonna also dig deeper and answer some very important questions:

- How to know if the belief you have for yourself is Authentic or a conditioned one?

- How to break through a belief that you've been thinking it's who you are?
- How Living with the Conditioned & False Beliefs is Hurting you?

And much more.. Listen to today’s episode HERE

If you like Today’s Episode, please don’t hesitate to post a 5-Stars review if you’re listening to the Podcast on Apple iTunes or Spotify and leave us a review telling us how our podcast helped you in a specific aspect of your life. It makes me so happy to see listeners' feedback because it motivates me to create content that is impactful for you and other listeners.

You Are Brilliant! Here’s why…

You are a unique human being. There is no one like you. There never was and never will be again. 

Every skill, talent and gift you have needs to be expressed. Otherwise, the world will miss out on it. Because NO ONE will ever do it -  or be it - exactly the way you will. 

That’s what I call your Brilliance. It’s that magical combination that makes you, you. 

I want all of us to own our brilliance. It took me a long time to do it.

I thought I was being arrogant if I said I was good at stuff. “Pride cometh before a fall” is a message I heard all my life. 

I’m over it. That was a lie. It’s not arrogant to know and say what you’re good at! 

So, I want to hear what you’re really good at. It might be a skill or talent, like you’re a great cook or singer, you play the banjo or can train dogs. Make a list of the things you’re good at! 

I also want to hear about who you are that is part of your brilliance. Are you empathetic, thoughtful, easily grateful, an optimist, encourager, loving, helpful, or something else that is lovely! Those things are as important as the tangible skills, talents and gifts we have. Make a list of the lovely qualities of who you are too! 

The world desperately needs for all of us to Own Our Brilliance!

What do you want to be when you grow up?

It’s a question we ask kids all the time. 

I wonder, when was the last time you asked yourself that question? 

I ask it myself frequently. Who do I want to be? Because “growing up” is a continual process. And who I used to be is nothing like who I am now. 

Who we have been does not determine who we CAN be. 

I used to be a rigid, and while I hate to admit it, a judgmental evangelical Christian. Of course not all Christians are like I was but I was the kind who told you that you were going to hell unless you “asked Jesus into your heart.” I believed, without question, that everyone who believed differently than what my church preached as “the Truth” was going to hell. 

I used to believe all sex outside of marriage was a sin. 

I used to believe as a woman, I had less value than a man. 

I used to believe it was my job to support, serve and care for everyone around me, without complaint and without even thinking about my own needs, because, after all, they were second, third or even farther down the list of priorities. Smile and serve. 

I used to believe that if I happened to think I was good at something, that was arrogant and being arrogant was shameful. So, if I did manage to feel good about something I did or a talent I had, I would immediately feel bad because I had felt good. 

I am happy to say, I do not believe ANY of those things anymore. 

It was a long hard road for me. Almost everything I have become was counter to what I was raised with. But somewhere along the way I understood, if I didn’t start prioritizing myself and choosing situations, work and relationships that valued me and honored me, I would die. 

That may sound dramatic but if you’ve given yourself to others, on an ongoing basis at your own expense, you know what I mean. It’s exhausting and you begin to lose yourself to the extent that you feel invisible - which is very much a death. A death of your inner being. 

Today I turn 61 years old and I’m still asking, who do I want to be when I grow up? Because for me, the trajectory of growth is never ending. Not in an exhausting way, in an exhilarating way! 

And I know the secret to me becoming an even higher expression in myself is about being willing to let go of old beliefs and thoughts that limit me.  That’s why I love coaching. With every client, in a way that is unique for them, I coach them into releasing their old beliefs and thoughts that limit and diminish them and claim the magnificent being that they truly are! 

I’d love to chat with you about working with me. Use this link: https://app.acuityscheduling.com/schedule.php?owner=11249251&appointmentType=8395116 to book a call and we'll talk.

What’s your personal power level right now?

I love the word, sovereign. 

What does it mean? “Supreme power and authority to rule.” 

Be the sovereign in your own life. 

There’s no one but you who should be the authority in your life. Only You. 

You need to have supreme power in your life. 

It doesn’t make you selfish or self-centered. 

It doesn’t justify meanness or judgment towards others. 

It’s a statement about who you are in relationship to yourself. 

Supreme power and authority over your life belongs to you and only you. 

When we feel like we don’t have power, it’s because we’ve lost track of our sovereignty. We’ve allowed a person or a circumstance to have power over us. 

This time of year that’s really easy to do. 

And, we can come back to sovereignty as soon as we notice it! 

No person or circumstance has a “right” to your sovereignty or power. . 

As people pleasers we were never taught that. 

There was another person, or people, who wanted that level of power and authority in our lives. They conditioned us out of being the sovereign in our lives, so they could be the authority and have the power. 

It’s time to take our power back. 

You have an absolute right to be the supreme power and authority in your life. 

I’m curious? How does that feel? 

Don’t be surprised if you feel awkward about it, or it feels selfish, or arrogant. Remember, you’ve been conditioned to think that way. But, tell me, if not you, who? Who should have power over your life? 

You are a unique human being. There’s no one like you. No one knows you as well as you do. You are the authority on you. You deserve the power of sovereignty in your own life. 

Let’s make sure you have your power and keep it as you transition out of one year and into another. Complete this simple form and we’ll see if it makes sense to work together in the coming year. 

Because all your power is waiting for you to come find it. Living from your power is living in liberation! 

Do you run away or run towards?

They say each of us is motivated to either---

• Run away from what we don’t want

• Run toward what we do want

I have found this to be very true as a coach and all my years in real estate. 

People are motivated by what they don’t want to have happen, or by what they do want to happen. 

Take someone who is a multimillionaire. I’ve known several extremely successful people who are driven to make a lot of money because they are afraid of being broke. The more they make the farther away from broke they are and they love that. 

Me, I am driven to run towards what I want. What do I want? To get my message of liberation to the masses. To coach as many people as I can to their own personal liberation. To live at the beach. To travel. To take my kids on vacations that are my “treat.” 

Don’t get me wrong, I HATE being broke, but running away from being broke doesn’t motivate me. Running towards abundance does. 

Which are you? 

The wonderful thing is, it doesn’t really matter as long as you’re running into your authentic power and self-expression. 

That’s what I love about working with each client I have. Everyone is different. Each one needs a unique solution, because they are unique. 

What’s the unique solution you need? I’d love to help you find it. 

I’ve got 3 spots left in my calendar for one-to-one clients. When they’re gone, they’re gone. Run away from missing out or run towards the opportunity!  My 90-Day Package is the best bargain - I don’t plan on offering it at this price again - and there are other options if 90-Days feels like “too much.” Some client’s like to start with 3 sessions and take it from there. 

Run over and complete this simple form, it will take about 5 minutes, then I’ll reach out and we’ll decide what’s best for you right now. 

Don’t wait. My calendar will fill up, and more importantly, your liberated, authentic life is waiting for you!! 

How Life Changes with Boundaries?

Have you ever wondered how your life might really change if you got good at setting boundaries?

Setting boundaries is an important part of establishing one’s identity and is a crucial aspect of mental health and well-being. Our personal boundaries aren’t as obvious as a fence or a giant “no trespassing” sign, they’re more like invisible bubbles.

Even though personal boundaries can be challenging to navigate, setting and communicating them is essential for our health, well-being, and even our safety. Setting boundaries for yourself and honoring the boundaries of others is a cornerstone in living authentically. 

In today’s episode of Liberate Your People Pleaser I’m going to dig deep and answer some  very important question regarding today’ topic:

What are Boundaries? 

Why should you set up your boundaries with Toxic people?

How to Set Better Boundaries with Toxic People?

How to build your own personal and emotional space?

And much more.. Listen to today’s episode HERE

If you like Today’s Episode, please don’t hesitate to post a 5-Stars review if you’re listening to the Podcast on Apple iTunes or Spotify and leave us a review telling us how our podcast helped you in a specific aspect of your life. It makes me so happy to see listeners' feedback because it motivates me to create content that is impactful for you and other listeners.

The Key to Transitions

Life is all about making transitions. 

We go to college, get married (maybe,) have kids (maybe,) move to our first home, move up to a bigger home, take a new job, leave a job, open a business, close a business, empty our nest (if we had one,) get divorced, meet someone new, and on and on. 

Transitions are full of turmoil, change, uncertainty and lots of moving parts, even when it’s a transition we want. Let alone the ones we don’t want. 

Right now, we’re all transitioning into a different lifestyle. 

After over a year of staying home, having our social lives restricted and our work lives changed… restrictions are loosening up almost everywhere and what’s interesting is how uncomfortable it is to “go back to the way it was.” 

We’ve wanted it for over a year. “I can’t wait until things get back to normal.” 

Here’s the key to transitions. Once you make them, they change you. Whether you know it or not. Whether you realize it along the way, or not. 

We can’t “go back to the way it was” because we are no longer who we were pre-pandemic. 

And that’s a good thing. 

Let the new version of who you are explore how to live in authentic self-expression and exploration. Approach it with “beginner’s mind.” The mind that has no preconceived ideas of how things “should” be. Explore and expand. 

Allow for the limitless Source to introduce you to new people, new experiences and a new way to do “old” things. 

The blessing of a transition is it allows us to let go of the old and usher in the new with open arms! Don’t fight it! Embrace it! 

Do You Ever Feel Overwhelmed?

We’ve all felt overwhelmed at some point in the last year. 

I’ve worked with several clients who were experiencing a deep feeling of overwhelm. 

I imagine you can relate. 

Where does all this overwhelm come from?

More importantly, what the heck do we do about it? 

Every client I’ve worked with resolves their overwhelm when they get grounded and focused on their own power to affect their life. 

Overwhelm is a sign that we’ve left our “home.” That unlimited power that is at the very center of our being. It’s the very truth of who we are. 

It may be buried under a huge to-do list, or the wants and needs of others, the toxic co-worker or angst in some area of your life. But it’s there. I promise. 

Like every client I coach, you can solve the feeling of overwhelm by accessing that place of power that is living within you every moment of every day. 

Sure, you may still have a problem to solve, a boundary to set, a difficult conversation to have, but you’ll do it from a position of strength and confidence. You solve it as a person living from the truth of your authentic power. 

There’s no overwhelm when we’re in our power. 

If you want some help accessing that power, I can be your guide. DM me. All you need to do is tell me you’re ready to live from your authentic power! You deserve it! 

I’d like to make it easier for you…

You know how it is so freakin hard to get from “knowing better” and what I mean by that is, you have an insight or new awareness, to…  “doing better?”

I love to have a great insight, the “Aha!” moment that feels like it changes everything… but does it? 

It can be sooooo hard to actually change! 

Here are some things most of us are challenged by when it comes to knowing better vs doing better:

• Actually NOT getting triggered when our Mom says that thing she says that makes us crazy. 

• Setting a boundary we know is needed but we’re afraid it will piss someone off

• Prioritizing our own self-care over career/business demands

You get my point.  

We know we should do the-thing. But we don’t. 

Here’s the solution, in a way, it’s not even your fault. But you're the only hero for this journey….

You’ve got to retrain your subconscious mind. 

How do we do that? 

By using our conscious minds differently. 

That’s why meditation can work. That’s why coaching can work. That’s why digital programs can work. 

We focus our attention, thoughts, feelings and actions on a particular issue and start the change process. 

But it is a process. 

That’s why mediation, coaching, digital programs, etc. don’t always work. 

It’s up to us to put in the effort, and trust me, it’s effort to think differently. Feel differently, respond differently. 

That’s why I love my clients. They are committed to closing that “knowing/doing gap” and actually transform into a new being. It’s as beautiful as a caterpillar becoming a butterfly! 

If you want some help closing your “knowing/doing gap,” I’ve got a couple spots opening soon in my calendar. One of them could be yours. Book a 15-minute call and we’ll decide together if now is the right time and if I am the right coach. Book your call HERE. 

What is the antidote to oppression?

Those of us who are people pleasers became one as a coping mechanism against oppression. 

That may sound dramatic, but it’s true. 

You experienced oppression at some point in your life. So did I. 

What’s behind all oppression is a denial of the truth for the person being oppressed. Their right to express their truth. When we are oppressed it is a denial of our value as unique human beings. 

Oppression can occur in overt ways and very subtle ways. 

It may be the open manipulation, control, racism, sexism and/or condemnation by a person who believes they are superior.

It might be overt shaming for who you are or what you believe. 

It might be a subtle glance from a parent when you tell them you’re gay/trans/non-binary or some other thing that freaks them out like hearing you don’t want to become the Dr. they always wanted you to be.  

When we experience oppression it’s a common reaction to please our oppressors. To conform, even if not entirely, into something the oppressor will “like.”

What’s the antidote to oppression? 

Authentic Power. 

Authentic Power always begins internally. 

Then, it changes externally in how we show up in the world. 

Authentic power is what every oppressor hates. Which is why there are so my examples of oppressors unjustly punishing, incarcerating and “casting out” when those they wish to oppress won’t be oppressed. Think Rosa Parks, Lillian Lennon (@mslillianlennon,) Nelson Mandela, etc.

That’s why I’m on a mission to liberate people pleasers. Because being liberated means we are standing in our authentic power. 

It means we speak up.

It means we don’t diminish or silence our truth because it’s not convenient or easy. 

It means we prioritize our wants and needs so that we are not easily fooled by a charismatic oppressor. 

That’s what the world needs. The world needs all of us to own our authentic power. It is our birthright. 

Sure, it will piss off the oppressors, but I think it’s time! Are you with me?

How Can Pleasure Can be a Litmus Test?

Do you use pleasure as a litmus test? 

You may think that is a crazy question! 

In the world I grew up in there was a sort-of “nobility” placed on suffering and definite suspicion about anything around pleasure!

No one openly talked about pleasure. 

Even sex wasn’t talked about in the context of pleasure. It’s as if you should keep it to yourself if you were experiencing pleasure with sex. 

Anybody with me?? Comment down below and tell me if anyone you grew up with talked about pleasure!? 

As I’ve grown spiritually, I’ve begun to understand the true role of pleasure as a tool for guidance.

Yes, I’ve just used the words, spiritually, pleasure and guidance in the same sentence! 

I have come to know and experience that we are, I am, you are - designed for pleasure. 

When it’s time to make a decision, a great way to know what to do, is to ask, “does this feel like pleasure or pain?” 

I’ve learned the hard way sometimes, to move towards pleasure. 

Sure, the pain decision is sometimes more socially accepted. We live in a time that thrives on fear, pain, suffering, anxiety and things being “hard.” 

But, pleasure… that takes me into my unique self-expression. 

Pleasure leads me into authentic power. 

Pleasure moves me towards “scared-cited.” A lovely phrase for when you’re stretching outside of your comfort zone and into your next evolution. 

I hope you’ll join me for a Club and a Room I’ve recently started in Clubhouse. I apologize in advance for android users who can’t join. It wasn’t my idea to make it an Apple only platform, but alas… it is. 

The Club is, Sex+Pleasure+Freedom and the Room is, Sex as a Gateway to Awakening, which meets every Wednesday at 12:30 pm Pacific time. 

Follow me in Clubhouse, after setting up your profile and I’ll follow you too. 

Join the Sex+Pleasure+Freedom Club here: https://www.joinclubhouse.com/club/sex-pleasure-freedom

Join me for the Room Sex as a Gateway to Awakening on Weds. at 12:30 pm Pacific  here: https://www.joinclubhouse.com/event/mWOlVAn8

If you aren’t in Clubhouse, let me know with your reply that this topic interests you. I am super passionate about this topic and would gladly coach or create a program for it!